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Monday, November 19, 2012

SABC’s Crown Gospel awards turned into a clown festival

Deborah Fraser - No Sister, table cloths are for tables and not dresses!

The way I laughed I thought it’s time for Gospel comedy awards. It was a poppy-house at this year’s SABC Crown Gospel Award(s) held at the ICC, Durban.  

I was so surprised when Sipho Makabane received a contemporary Gospel Crown Award, I mean like really? He even had the nerve of accepting it knowing it was a huge mistake by the organizers. How can he get up on stage and accept what is not his on such a stature event? Anyway… Thanks to the Master of Ceremony who recalled Big Fish and re-handed the award to where it rightfully belongs,  to ‘Karabo’.

Zanele Mbokazi is the founder of the South African ‘Crown Gospel Awards’ – she’s an ex telly Personality and rumors are at it that she’s in matrimony with a Bishop, let it be a soul sister Mbokazi! I loved your red carpet looking long tale dress, so may you please humbly advise the following folks on how to choose a perfect fabric?

Ntokozo Mbambo with her outrageous balloon outfits, girl do you ever give your tiny hubby a chance to talk? Gone are those days when men use to be the head not the tail.

Thobekile with her Durban July dress! I was like, can you please stop looking at me as if I owe you something dear.

Nobathembu of Joyous Celebration -  her dress with a flight of stairs that can walk the whole parishioners!

Remember Vicky Vilakazi of Family Factory? Who claims I step on her cheap blue gown, oh dearest it was a poor mistake. Obviously my shoes were in some shock too!

 On the red Carpet:

Arms Out Sisters - All I can say is balloons can be displayed anywhere!

Pastor - Benjamin Dube

Mzwandile - Ex Spirit Sundae Presenter!

Keke - shame on you! Wake up! Colour blocking is so last year!

Lundi looked like some boy from the mountain! Style up China!

LOL! I somehow noticed Big Nuz in the house and only to find out it's Redeemed; they indeed redeemed so much fake stunts...

Can someone tell Obrigado to stop shouting when he speaks, I mean like really?

Gwen ended up tagging solo, photographer disappeared thinking some prophet will reveal his secrets. I had to take photos and I am not good at taking those, especially when people are not photogenic. Excuse my imagery moods.

Rebecca Malope
Bump into Eugene of Trompies running off the red carpet with the wife. Sister Rebecca nice color and fabric, Gwen love baby blue, Claps hands! Ex Spirit Sundae presenter Mzwandile something… clueless of where he was with his lobola negotiations crew suits. Despite the fact that some guy named Israel Mosatle kicked my people out of the limo as he claims he's in the lineup and needs to get to the venue first. Doll next time please be on time, it's the Gospel in you that says so. He also had too many family members, hopefully, next time he will take a bus.

Remember Lundi of Mpefumlo wam? Tata when is the wedding you told us about and why do you look like you are in pain? Thobekile was looking at me as if I owe her some royalties, we hardly know each other. Fikile Mdinga please sister this is 2012 with your Zahara inspired head fabric cloth. People flocked so late, so much that Gwen did not see who was singing during the worship hour. Hlengiwe Mhlaba are you one of Oom Raymond's kids? Love the Xhosa outfit with all arms out.

I am certain that China city ran out of fabrics and I have never seen so many fake garments in one night.  

She did it once again, Swazi Dlamini with her narrative attitude reminded me of ‘Iphi Ntombi,’ the musical.  In the middle of the ceremony Zolisa Xaluva “Jason” from SABC’S once popular soap shows up looking lost with his girlfriend.  

Kgotso try Virgin Active it works or asks Zolani Mahola of Freshly ground for advice and bring along Nobathembu with you.  Lindelani Mkhize how was the funeral of your Mother?  Did Nkanyiso Bhengu sing too? Somebody please tell me if Mama Mantuli Zuma had to bring a makeup artist on every occasion? Your make up artist looked like Iko Mash, what a drag!

The ceremony:

 Zahara and Sipho Makabane must be using the same Sangoma for dominating on this year’s awards. It was good to see Swaziland artists dominating on stage as Zanele’s hubby is from Swaziland, oops did we call in some favour? Before I forget another first lady who was unnoticed is Thobeka Zuma.  

Honestly I don’t know what was Sliq and Thembi Seate doing on stage, I missed that one. Our highlight moment - Gospel artists turned into Idols during the grand finale featuring Rebecca Malope, Big Fish, Israel Mosetla, Debra Frazer, Obrigado and Benjamin Dube, of course, looking confused and tired. Guests and VIP’s were treated and served dinner at the early hours of the morning yawning.  Gwen never gets tired but next time Zanele do something since you now have another five years with the SABC.  Cheers to the Five years of Grace!

By Gwen Maraj

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